THE hyper-sensitivity of the snowflake generation continues apace with the news that a lesbian couple were so upset by a midwife referring to the “fella’s” role during an antenatal class that they were “too upset” to return.
They made an official complaint, were offered one-to-one “parentcraft” lessons (at taxpayers’ expense, presumably) and, most depressingly of all, bosses at the Blackpool Victoria Hospital have now ordered all midwives to use the word “partner” during such sessions to avoid any possible smidgen of offence in the future.
The Royal College of Midwives said that midwives and nurses must: “Treat people as individuals and uphold their dignity and avoid making assumptions and recognise diversity and choice.”
It follows on from the recent guidance issued to doctors that the phrase “pregnant people” should be used instead of “expectant mothers” to avoid offending any woman with child who might be in the middle of changing gender.
Ye gods. Someone pass me the gas and air.
Every second of every day, doctors, midwives, nurses are working tirelessly around the country; delivering critical care, wiping bums, drying tears and providing vital reassurance to patients and their families at times of great duress.
And now they have to deal with this nonsense?
What should have happened is that, at the first mention of the “fella’s” role, Mrs and Mrs Smith should have said, with a big, cheesy grin: “Or in our case, partner.”
Point made. If, indeed, it needed to be made at all.
But no. In a clear case of confected outrage, they made an official complaint and probably subjected the poor midwife to the scrutiny of an internal inquiry. Shame on them.
And by the way, I hate to break it to you ladies, but a “fella” did play a role in the pregnancy . . . because without one being involved somewhere along the line, you wouldn’t be expecting a baby in the first place.
- A BUSINESSMAN is suing taxi firm Uber for millions after a glitch in its app meant his wife was sent notifications of his trips to see a secret lover.
She is now divorcing him and the Frenchman wants compensation because, according to his lawyer, “the bug has caused him problems in his private life”.
I don’t suppose he’s considered the possibility that if he hadn’t had an affair in the first place, his marriage might still be going strong?
Nope, thought not.
- AN internet bride dubbed the “Black Widow” for allegedly being involved in the murder of her wealthy British husband received £21,000 in legal aid to fight his family over his will.
Now, our Legal Aid Agency is demanding the money back.
As former stripper Ganna Ziuzina is now residing in Spain with another mug wealthy British businessman, something tells me they’re not going to get it.
Tamara really milks it
We know this because she posed for a glossy photoshoot while in the act, prompting criticism on social media.
Hitting back, she posted another photo and added: “Find it a very sad and surprising sign of the times and the world we live in that the act of breastfeeding your child evokes such hatred in so many bitter people.”
Hmmm. While there are undoubtedly some Grade A nasties operating on social media, one suspects the majority of people commenting critically were doing so not because Tamara is breastfeeding as such.
More that she feels the need to pose for expensively staged, look-at-me photos in which she is ramming it down our throats as well as her child’s.
Beauty is a pain in the neck
IT’S hard to believe that former supermodel Christie Brinkley is 63.
In recent photos she looks about 35 – but admirably she freely admits that her youthful looks are no accident.
Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin . . .
She’s a big fan of a skin treatment called collagen wave therapy, which she uses for her face and knees; has botox injected in to her neck to combat wrinkles; follows a strict vegan diet of no dairy, low sugar; eats an apple 20 minutes before each meal; does 100 push-ups a day; does yoga, runs, skis, surfs and swims regularly; is a devotee of the Total Gym weights machine; drinks “tons” of water; applies suncream every day; has a weekly deep tissue massage; is “hooked” on a 45-minute exercise bike class called SoulCycle; has regular facial fillers; exfoliates all over daily; has regular trips to a hair colourist and fits extensions to boost her tresses.
Cripes, no wonder the four-times-divorced beauty is currently single.
Where on earth would she find the time to go on a date?
NHS blind stupidity
A COUPLE of weeks after an NHS hospital was quoted £5,500 to replace a dishwasher, another – the Royal Berkshire in Reading – has been told by its “official contractor” that it will cost £855.80 to replace a roller blind in a procedures room.
In a triumph of common sense, the matron went and bought one for £22.95 and got someone from the hospital’s in-house “estate services” to fit it for free.
We know this because the hospital’s senior respiratory consultant, Dr Chris Davies, wrote about it on his Facebook page, a posting that he thought was just to his family and friends but turned out to be publicly available too.
A spokesman for the hospital’s Trust Foundation was quick to point out that he was messaging “in a private capacity”.
But why the secrecy?
Surely, senior medical staff should be actively encouraged to go public when they see much-needed funds being haemorrhaged so wastefully that could be channelled towards vital medical care?
MPs have been told that the nation’s parks are full of rats, broken playground equipment and stinking, uncleaned water features because of “council cuts”.
And yet, funnily enough, try to feed the hardy ducks on that festering water, or drop a couple of cherry stones during a snack break on a park bench, and chances are there are still the funds available for a legion of park wardens to leap out from behind a bush and issue you with a penalty ticket for littering.
Jackie O let ’em down gently
FOUR decades after they were written, letters have emerged in which Jackie Kennedy – widow of assassinated president JFK – turned down an offer of marriage from British aristocrat Lord Harlech in favour of shipping tycoon Aristotle Onassis.
She wrote: “You and I have shared so many lives and deaths and hopes and pain, if ever I can find some healing and some comfort – it has to be with someone who is not a part of all of my world of past and pain.”
What she meant was: I don’t fancy you and, besides, he’s richer.
“WITH everything that is going on in the world, I want to make my customer feel secure, comfortable, empowered.”
The words of an armoured car manufacturer perhaps? Or someone who runs a safe house in war-torn Syria? Nope. It’s Victoria Beckham explaining why her latest clothes collection draws inspiration from the oversized blazers and massive shoulder pads of the 1980s. Talk about Rah-Rah Land.
Adele’s classy as ever
YOU’VE got to hand it to Adele.
In a roomful of fellow artistes who spend every second of their lives prostrating themselves on the altar of “celebrity” in a desperate bid to stay relevant, she breezed on stage in a rare public appearance and stole the Grammys from under their suspiciously perfect noses.
There was no flashing of cleavage, no thigh split, no peddling of her young child: Just an everyday gal in a demure frock, with a “husband” she hasn’t sold to a glossy mag, an understated hairdo and an abundance of talent that speaks for itself.
What a gal.
And, most importantly, what a great example to any young girl hoping to break in to the music industry – that you don’t have to shamelessly sell every aspect of yourself to sell good records.
Lesbian News From Around The Nation -Courtesy of Google News
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